Verse 1
Aww shucks – think I’m in love
But it’s probably more like lust
Most birds I don’t give a fuck
But love you’re stuck – love you’re stuck
Inside my head like – cerebellum
Babe you’re sweet like – water – melon
You can be the early 80’s – smellin’
I’ll play the role of Mount St Helens

Chorus
…Let’s be more than friends
We can make love – instead
Hit the bed – and do that shit again
I thought my heart was dead
Until I seen your lens
I got lost in them
And I don’t want directions
This is not about erections
Cuz your love be infectious
Like the death penalty in Texas
So come on love just text us
And tell me you concur
Cuz I’ve been feeling burr
And I think you could cure
The heartache I endure

Verse 2
First time I met you – I was steamin’
Can’t remember – that there weekend
The mouth of me – was truly leapin’
All my manners – they were weakened
But you just looked so damn appealin’
I had to say what I was feelin’
Maybe it was – the mephedrone speakin’
But I think you found me intriguin’

But I’m all right – and you’re so great
And a birdie told me you liked my mate
My first impression was too risqué
Like Michael Stone on that Milltown day
Well that’s no bother sure I can wait
I’m patient – I procrastinate
Cuz you’re so sweet and soft like crêpes
All I ask is that we date





Verse 3
Your eyes be looking so Mary – poppins
Hole’s like a big bag of grass – whoppin’
We can do pretend Christmas – shoppin’
Penis the gift – your clit the wrappin’
I’m like a book being read – open
Thinking a bunch about you – hopin’
We convert text to sex – gropin’
Finish that shit in bed – soakin’

I’m not a whole lot to look at – true
Cuter than Andrex puppies – you
Shot me down like an F22
Been wrecking my head like a spide – glue
Let’s do breathing exercises – together
Eat all veggie in shitty – weather
…Just want to get to know you better
Just want to get to know you better

Verse 4
About her I don’t know many things
But this don’t mean much of anything
I know she sings – and know she brings
A smile to this here human being
Every time I see her – I want her more
She’s rock cocaine – I’m a crack whore
I’m a wee stoner – she’s a wee score
For her I’d delete all my porn

Out with her’s where I want to be – hangin’
Body’s like two porn stars – bangin’
But I’m the filth – and she’s the Lagan
I’ve got to be with her – shaggin’
…Wanna shoot her up - needles
We can come together – Beatles
Raw – save costs on bags – Lidl
Don’t want to swap my box – deal

Verse 5
Looks I’m wishing I didn’t - lack
It’s becoming clear – you don’t like me back
I’ve pulled some crackers – in the past
But this means nout without your ass
Never been one to fight for love
If it’s there I shouldn’t have to throw a punch
It should just fit like bolts in nuts
If it don’t click I just give up